This week we're doing "role-playing" which terrifies the hell out of me. It's kind of like being in a horrible high school production, half improv/half scripted, only I don't get the joy of singing off key combined with the extreme awesomeness of trying to learn the Charleston in front of a gym full of men of indeterminate sexual orientation, all of whom are in revealing colored tights.

I might actually enjoy this a lot better if the men in class had to wear revealing tights. Not because any of them are at all attractive to me, but just because I'd feel slightly less awkward and revolting with my horrible stuttering, lack of experience and childish voice, and I'd at least have an excuse when I got distracted and stumbled over my "lines."

In fact, maybe life should just be filled with men in skimpy spandex garments. Yeah. It seems like a good idea right now, but of course I've only had about four hours of sleep. Still, if any of you out there would like to send me pictures...well...it could be like your good deed of the day or something. Don't be shy!

I think the only thing stopping me from rocking out with my (extremely businessey) socks out is my own inability to do a book presentation, owing in part to the fact that we don't get that particular phone book in my area, and also in part because I forgot my book tonight and ended up doing a mock book presentation whilst in the bathtub, using a "Cathy 20th Anniversary Collection" in lieu of a 30 pound book of yellow pages.

I suppose I'm beating myself up more than I should...at least what I'm doing is ethical and helpful to small businesses and the Ohio economy. It's not like I'm selling Ye Olde DIY Asbestos Tiling Kit or something equally horrific. I may have found the one sales job that's not about screwing people (honestly!) and I'm sure my fear of not being able to improve myself is more of a reflection on never really having to work hard at much of anything in my life than it is a reflection on doing something abyssmal. And for the record, I never had to work too hard at anything not because I'm super talented at anything (which is NOT the case) but because I'm really lazy and like all lazy Americans, I want to make the most amount of money possible for being as motionless as possible. I figure if I practice this and work on it REEEAAALLLYYYY hard for the first few months, it'll come naturally and I'll assume it's "easy" and then I can go back to being "lazy" and everyone will be a lot happier, as I tend to be a high stress person.

I'm going to bed.

Adios.